THEY WALK AMONG US!!! Night Of The Living Brain-dead!!!

[Fat Man]

They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I Gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was Educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back, same scenario!

I departed the store with the $46.64.

They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail

I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one-get-one-free," she said, "so I guess they're both free"

She Handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

They Walk Among Us!

One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked Up at the sky and said, "Where"?

They Walk Among Us!

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real Estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff."

They Walk Among Us!!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said "Pacific".

They Walk Among Us!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

They Walk Among Us!

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"

They Walk Among Us!

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

[abitagirl]

I thought this was going to be about sports bores, until I realized it was in Off Topic.

[Fat Man]

I thought this was going to be about sports bores, until I realized it was in Off Topic.

Well, it's quite possible that these brain-dead among us were born as a result of their redneck sports fan parents having sex with barnyard animals!

[Skul]

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

You know, I swear I've heard this one somewhere before. It just sounds familiar.

And we already know about the brain-dead sports bores who walk among us. Just look at what all the pink-names say...

[Fat Man]

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

You know, I swear I've heard this one somewhere before. It just sounds familiar.

And we already know about the brain-dead sports bores who walk among us. Just look at what all the pink-names say...

My favorite is this one . . . . .

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

Now, if I were to buy 3 cases of beer, the idiot would have given me a 30% percent discount. If I were to buy 5 cases of beer, that would have been a 50% percent discount, and if I had bought 9 cases of beer, than that would have been a 90% percent discount.

You see where I'm going with this???

If I had bought 10 cases, then it would have been a 100% percent discount and I would walk out with 10 cases of FREE beer!

Now, if I had bought 11 cases or more, then the guy at the store would have owed me money.

WOW! He would have to pay me, to take away a carload of beer.

God must really love morons because he made so many of them!!!

[blackdog4444]

rofl@ the dead bird one. Who knew dead birds could fly?